She's Baaaack!

Well, my daughter came back from her cousin's house. I missed her, and she was all about stories of swimming in the pool, playing with her cousin, showing me her new skirt, and telling me how much fun she had. I was thrilled, especially to have her back. I asked if she'd had her hair washed, and she told me her aunt washed it, but had gotten some soap in her eyes. I said, "I bet you were a big girl and didn't cry,"

"No Mommy, I screamed really loud, like this 'Aaaaaahhhhh!" Well then.

As soon as she took a breath, we discussed her new-found affection for hourglasses, since she wasn't here for the actual clean up.

She got kind of quiet, and I asked her if she remembered who had broken the hourglass. "You found that?" she whispered.

"Yep," I whispered back.

"Where did you find it?" she asked quietly.

"Under your mattress, broken," I said equally quietly.

"Oh," she said in a tiny voice. "Well, I wanted to play with it."

"No more playing with Mommy's things," and we talked about it most of the evening, but I was so happy to have her back, we skipped the spanking and went right to the bitching about it. Specifically, me bitching at her. So, back to normal.

You know who wasn't happy to have her back? Her sister, that's who. As of right now, she's been back for five hours, and the baby has screamed six times. One hour of that we were running errands, and a half hour of that they were eating. That's gotta be a record of some sort.

"Mommy, baby sisser won't share her blanket...Mommy, baby sisser won't share her toy...Mommy, babby sisser's in the toy box...Mommy, baby sisser took my Barbie doll!" And each one punctuated by a piercing scream! Well, the bloom is off of that rose already! They may need separate rooms soon. Shit!

While she was pottying, she showed me her new underwear, and pointed to a turquoise circle, and said, "blue." I told her it was turquoise.

"It's not tur-koise, it's blue!" was what she tells me in a petulant voice. You moron, Mommy! Don't you know your colors! was what the tone said.

"It is blue, but it's turquoise blue." Now it's a crusade. My knowledge must be redeemed! She will believe what I say, dammit!

"No, it's blue, not tur-koise, Mommy!" So I start showing her shades of colors, and explained that different shades of the same color have different names sometimes. She didn't believe me. Really, what do I have to do with this kid? Eventually she just dropped it because it was time to run errands, and she was distracted by Bug Juice. Whatever it takes to win. 'All's fair in love and war' right?

After dinner, she brought me her broken Barbie doll, the one missing feet. She said her sister did it, but she still loves her Barbie. "I love you Barbie, even if you don't have feet." I told her she should play with the mermaid doll, the one with fingernail polish on it, and she said no. "She looks like a zombie mermaid. I don't like her anymore." Oookaaaay then...