The Divisible Dog

Some kids are whiny. And too easily upset. Case in point: a 4-going-on-14 year old girl. I routinely say normal things that cause sudden, unexpected crying fits in my "toddler pre-premenstrual" mini me. Seriously, what normal kid cries uncontrollably when their mom tells them to change clothes? She and I will start off with a normal conversation, then BAM! She sprials into a whiny, teary, crybaby, seemingly out of the blue! She might as well turn into a diaper - leaky and full of shit.

Even Hell-Spawn Have To Sleep Sometime

Well, my fantastic, peaceful "golden days" of bringing order out of the living room chaos are officially gone, flushed down the toilet like the shit and toothbrushes flushed by my youngest mini-me, or "Spawn" as I (lovingly) think of her. I know the "terrible twos" are supposed to be bad, but never, and I do mean NEVER has any of my offspring been this downright ... ornery. It all started a few weeks ago...