So we're in week two of 'The Diet' and strangely enough, I feel both hungry and full at the same time, which, if you think of it, is quite an oxymoron! (Dr. Poole is right, you're an ox, and a moron! That movie rocks! So many big-name stars!) Small meals (well, small to me is normal To everyone else, right?) and small snacks every 2-3 hours. I have never eaten so much! And yet, conversely, been hungry at the same time. Weird, huh?
Let me back up a bit, we decided (meaning I decided - yep, I'll say it!) to go on a diet. The honey and I are between 30-80 lbs overweight (and you had just better not be thinking I'm at the top of that weight range estimate, thank-you-very-much!) I've been a little chubby many years of my life (five kids can kinda do that) but in between kids, I've had bouts of svelt-ness. I want that back! I want my beach body, skinnier and lighter, where heads turn and best friends walk by and stop, grabbing your arm to feel for fat: "My god! You're so skinny! Are you puking?" (No, I wasn't, and yes, she really asked me. BFFs tend to ask the uncomfortable questions, that's one of her charms.) Anyway, I want my body back! And by god if I have to eat 9 times a day to get it, I will! It's called a 'Food Lover's Diet' but I guess familiarity does breed contempt. I'm finding out I didn't love food after all, it must have been just a passing fancy. Puppy love, if you will, and I'm really effing sick of eating!
So, we stocked the fridge with healthy food, and planned meals, and ... snack often. I have hypoglycemia, and this diet is playing havoc with my sugar. I think it works well with diabetics, but with hypoglycemics, not so much. My blood sugar drops at least three times a day, requiring me to eat again to get my blood sugar up. It's a vicious cycle, and I'm just not a snacker. I'm going to check into alternative snacks, and what exactly I can eat that will make it so I'm not shaky after an hour. I hate healthy food, it fucks me every time.
My honey was 'bigger' when we started dating, what with him being a weight-lifter type who eats like a gazillion calories a day! And yes, I'm so jealous! He physically works hard, unlike my job, which is mostly cerebral, but nevertheless, both of us can afford to lose a few pounds. He was not enthusiastic aout dieting, but I told him I would quit smoking if I lost 50 pounds. (And for those of you who pay attention, my goal is 30 pounds. Sneaky, huh?) He has a degree in physical therapy, and he sugar-coats it by calling it "food-mangement." Whatever you call it, it's making me nuts! (mmm, nuts, it must be time to snack again....) The difference between dieting and 'food-management' appears to be length of time, with dieting as a short-term solution, and food management as a long-term solution. I prefer the shorter term solution of dieting.
My honey tells me that his pants are falling off, and he's going to have to add couple of notches to his belt. I on the other hand have lost 3 or 4 pounds. (OK, 3. It's three, dammit, are you happy now? See, this diet makes me angry!) That's it! I am waiting for my svelt-tivity (svelt-ness, svelt-ivity. Whatever. Anyway) to return, and I want results. (The 3-4 el-bees don't really count since when we started the diet, I was 'bloated' but became ... 'unbloated' after a few days, and I think that's where the weight went. But I'm sticking through it, trying to become more by becoming less (catchy, it might go on a T-shirt! Hopefully, a smaller T-shirt...)
I guess I'm more of an 'immediate results' person, and this losing weight slowly by eating shit-loads of broccoli (pun intended) is wearing on my nerves. Oh, and part of this diet is supposed to involve working out, and the honey and I both agreed we're just not that into it. So, food-management for life, right? I started this for him dammit! I don't want to diet forever!
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